11.
It’s annoying to feel your stuff in your pocket. It’s terrifying to not feel your stuff in your pocket.—u/EagleswonSuperBowl52
12.
There’s nothing quite as uncertain or unstable as the first note of “Happy Birthday” being sung by a group of people.—u/mysteryxmike
13.
People who Instagram their meals are taking “before” photos of their shits.—u/Clark_W_Griswold
14.
Mountains are extremely slow motion waves….***extremely slow moving***—u/Miko54
15.
In the event of a zombie apocalypse, necrophilia would become an extreme sport—u/MyTeaIsMighty
16.
‘Dude lets start a podcast’ is this generations version of ‘Dude let’s start a band’.—u/slurmedmckenzie
17.
If we had two moons people would get into dumb fights over which one was better so we dodged a bullet there. —u/ironrunner32
18.
Being attracted to celebrities is easy because we haven’t had the chance to be turned off by their personalities.—u/OnceUponACockapuss
19.
Halloween is more about giving than Christmas is.—u/Blitzerxyz
20.
Since the Earth is round, our heads have traveled farther than our feet.—u/Xinovaz