Ok, so, let’s just set out from the get-go, this is above all our pay grades.
A recent post on the “Relationship Advice” forum on Reddit has blown up so big that it was officially removed by moderators for reaching “one of our comment/karma limits,” though the text of the post and the comments made before it was halted have been preserved.
The topic that got so many people riled up could rightfully be called a nightmare scenario for anyone in a long-term relationship.
The post claims that Reddit user’s wife is dying of a terminal illness with only nine months to live.
Her husband wants to do everything he can to make their remaining months a happy time and is trying to grant all of her final requests. One request, however, is a bit more difficult than the others.
“My dying wife asked me if I’d be okay if she had sex with her ex one last time”
Posted by u/throwawayforeife
“Recently she sat me down and told me that one of the last things she wanted to do was have sex with a previous partner of hers,” he wrote. “I of course was shocked and when I asked why the fuck she wants that. So basically she thinks that her most physically compatible and satisfying lover was him. She gave a whole monologue about how sex sometimes is just physical and how emotionally fulfilling sex is with me but it was bulls–t to get to that point.”
Naturally, the OP feels resentful of their wife putting him in this position, feeling like he’d be an a-hole to refuse his dying spouse any request but also, of course, not wanting his wife to go have sex with someone else.
“So now I’m left with this, deny my dying wife a wish for my own ego, or let her go fuck another man who she feels was better. Honestly, I’m so pissed of and betrayed that she asked this of me. I feel like I’m put in a position where I have to say yes because she’s dying.”
“I know what I want to say, but I don’t know if that’s right. I’m so hurt that sex with an ex was apparently so good that she needs to do it once before she dies. I just hate everything about this.”
If real, it truly is an awful situation. No amount of explanation will make it not hurt to hear that your wife preferred sex with her ex, emotionally or physically, and aside from those strong enough for polyamorous relationships, most people do not feel good about the idea of their partners having sex with others.
In spite of the limited time the OP’s wife has on this Earth (and aside from the people saying that the whole post is definitely fake), commenters have widely landed on the side of the husband, saying that it’s an unreasonable request.
Many feel that the wife will be leaving her husband with a lifetime of bitterness and hurt, making one of his last memories of her so painful and that no amount of dying justifies cheating.
Others have questions, such as whether or not his wife had already contacted her ex to see if he’d be willing to have sex with a dying ex-lover from over 10 years ago or feel that it would have been better not to put this decision on him at all.
With such an emotionally volatile topic, it’s no wonder the post broke the comment limit.