No means no, and that should be all you have to say to not have sex. Apparently, that’s not enough for some. I don’t want to entirely make fun of all the people who need excuses, because they’re probably mostly young or feeling vulnerable. But whoever made this list of “101 Ways to Say No to Sex” was really reaching for excuses.
A picture of the list of 101 Ways to Say No to Sex was shared by Twitter user @ROSNALJU and while I haven’t been able to find the origin of the pamphlet it seems pretty similar to those made by abstinence-only education programs. That might explain why some of these excuses are so stupid?
For example, @ROSNALJU says they’re number 17, or “I have a sunburn.” Not a bad reason to not have sex, but a little harder to fake.
tag urself I’m #27 pic.twitter.com/7gJvQoR3cS
— RO$NA (@ROSNALJU) July 20, 2020
After this one section of the list started circulating, Twitter user @Heres_Gianny replied saying they “found” the rest of the list. Perhaps in their own drawer:
Here are some of the best ones, if you need them. Or even if you don’t.
“I’ll let you know later.”
“Rub my back instead.”
“I know your reputation!”
“I’m allergic to sex.”
“Sex can be more trouble than it’s worth.”
“I don’t like kids.”
“I just got my hair done.”
“I’d rather watch the game.”
“My favorite show’s on now.”
“I have to go to the bathroom.”
“Ask me again in five years.”
“Let’s ask my parents”
The last nine are cut off, which is really a shame, because I would enjoy some sort of 101 days of getting out of sex challenge. Except I’ve already done it and it’s called quarantine.
Anyway, people are still enjoying finding the excuse they identify with the most:
I’m #42 “Don’t Make Me Laugh” pic.twitter.com/ZHXpF79MCC
— Sky Adams (CrossXBones)🏴☠️ 🏳️🌈 (@Cross_X_Bones) July 21, 2020
Love #72 “I want to stay a Virgin” 🤣 pic.twitter.com/Aj3AhgPfWs
— Trandler Bing ✊🚩🏴 (@FelixirofLife28) July 21, 2020
21 is really throwin me for a loop
— Mykie (@GlamandGore) July 22, 2020
Def number 16 for me pic.twitter.com/AW3rmKMfRA
— Leo (@LeoLeonets) July 21, 2020
My favorite – “In this economy?” – didn’t make it onto the list. Or perhaps it’s on the back.
— The science should not stand in the way of this (@mahfammalek) July 21, 2020
That’s 34: I just woke up with diarrhea.
— Russ (@26point2FoCo) July 21, 2020
i want to BE loved 👊🏻 not MAKE love 👏🏻
— jasmine rice (@jasminericegirl) July 21, 2020
adding “with you? lol never” to the list right after “it’s not worth it.”
— katherine (@kay_fil) July 21, 2020
41 has “in THIS economy” vibes pic.twitter.com/lmn2OV2kYL
— Chlo’ (@Langerss97) July 22, 2020
Why do we need 100 ways? Just “no” that’s it, men need to understand that “no.” is a complete sentence.
— HenryDel (@HenryDel6) July 22, 2020
Why aren’t YOU having sex today? Besides coronavirus?
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