Pleated-Jeans
11.
you don’t know how long it took to make him do this with me pic.twitter.com/cvR9tkPFRs
— Mia King (@miaababy__) February 28, 2020
12.
WHEN I WAS 10 I MADE AN IMOVIE TRAILER FOR MY PARENTS DIVORCE AND I JUST FOUND IT??? pic.twitter.com/eVJkosgOBX
— victoria (@filmtrashed) March 3, 2020
13.
in high school our gym teacher asked us who we thought the smartest teacher in the school was. we guessed the AP chem teacher, the precalc teacher, the AP physics teacher, etc. he goes, nope, it’s me because I get paid the same as those guys and I play dodgeball all day.
— (@spinubzilla) February 29, 2020
14.
she be looking at me like i’m crazy, but she with it too pic.twitter.com/yPBcdLs4Am
— Kee (@xamourkeke) March 1, 2020
15.
I was sent to a Costco to see if people are stocking up (even though health officials say it’s not necessary) in case COVID-19 gets more serious here. This guy came out of the store with 16 boxes of condoms and a big jar of coconut oil. We all have priorities. pic.twitter.com/C3edUsgZzH
— Jill Bennett (@jillreports) February 29, 2020
16.
A bird just flew in to my hotel room and I had a VERY different reaction from Cinderella.
— Laura Benanti (@LauraBenanti) March 2, 2020
17.
If you drive a PT Cruiser I will suck your dick so hard your grandpa will cum
— Edgar Allan Hoe (@Slashleen) March 3, 2020
18.
They shouldn’t have tried to hold an election AND teach Americans how to wash their hands, all in the same week. It was too much. We were overwhelmed.
— ditch pony (@molly7anne) March 4, 2020
19.
You can’t call it “pandemic” unless it’s from the Pandemic region of France, otherwise it’s just Sparkling Flu
— Sarah Parcak (@indyfromspace) March 5, 2020
20.
Biggest liars are those who pretend they prefer natural peanut butter to reg peanut butter. Yeah have fun stirring that oil
— Sarah Hagi (@geekylonglegs) March 1, 2020
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