Ruin My Week
31.
Cashiering at Starbucks I once greeted somebody, “hi, what can you make for me today?”
— danielle🏳️🌈 (@dan1ellenotdani) May 4, 2018
32.
Someone handed their car keys in as a deposit for a £5 set of golf clubs, I handed them back to the wrong people and the car was found crashed in a ditch a couple days later https://t.co/9MFwTeOHUf
— Alfie (@alfielowee) May 4, 2018
33.
a man came into the shop and said he was blind and that he wanted to come behind the till to pick his lotto numbers so i let him but then he started stealing and he wasn’t actually blind https://t.co/GxlAtI1qpp
— gillian o’brien (@joe_dolans_luvr) May 3, 2018
34.
Ran a newspaper piece saying this (well-known) photographer was dead, and his ashes had been scattered from a helicopter. He was still alive, and very, very angry
— Rob Waugh (@RobWaughMail) May 3, 2018
35.
Used to work at @pizzahut literally decades ago. It was quiet, they were going to let me go early so I took some acid. Then it got really busy and I had to stay. I clung to a sweeping brush for hours.
— tom o’malley (@notweetstom) May 3, 2018
36.
The driver ran into the hallway and threw up as I closed the curtain on the family…dragged the body back into the split casket just as my boss was getting into work. My only memory of the whole thing is from an out of body point of view
— △jorge△ no me friegues⚰🔥☁ (@nahthankya) May 3, 2018
37.
Retail assistant interview, they ask me if I was friendly I said “sometimes, not always”
— NicoLimo (@NICOLIMO) May 3, 2018
38.
Once I deleted a client’s website and had to restore by copying markup from google’s cache.
— Howard┃Silence is complicity┃■ (@citizen_of_now) May 3, 2018
39.
Colleague called a client from a hands free car phone, and left a voice message. Then we all bitched about that client for a bit, and yep, then realised we hadn’t actually hung-up.
— Chaz Hutton (@chazhutton) May 3, 2018
40.
I once applied for a job and got it, and now I have to spend 40 hours a week here https://t.co/vDsYaOLoV1
— Luc (@ellkay_) May 4, 2018
41.
1) Sent the Russian Government all of the G7 negotiating positions on Chernobyl clean up because it was at the end of a stack of G8 papers I supposed to send. 2) Got Nelson Mandela stuck on a disability stairlift in front of the then PM. Ah good days.
— Tim Binnington (@tim_binnington) May 3, 2018
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