Masha
31.
https://twitter.com/Not_The_Rule/status/1071584738060709888
32.
https://twitter.com/abbylaila_/status/1072497820580700162
33.
I told my sister to stop dating broke guys
And she told me if that's what all brother were saying to their sisters
I would be single too😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠
— Soldier↪ (@PatohShanqueels) May 3, 2018
34.
Her: I love sensitive guys
Me: I think that makes you so special, and it's what inspired me to write my most recent sonnet about you
Her: nope, not like that
— Sock Hollidre (@sock_holliday) July 24, 2018
35.
Me: *pronounces date like pâté*
Date: *pushing chair back in* I'm actually busy tonight
— Pivo (@bautanist) September 22, 2018
36.
https://twitter.com/hellolanemoore/status/951209071654440960
37.
[watching the Fast and the Furious, Vin Diesel appears on screen]
me: *whispers to date* that’s groot
— david (@_elvishpresley_) September 29, 2018
38.
[On a date]
Him: I love a woman with a sense of humor, I'm a sucker for a good pun.
Me: omg same. lol Jeremy if you were sliced up into little pieces and soaked in coffee liqueur and then layered between ladyfingers you'd be a jeramisu.
Him:
Me:
Him:
Me: jeramisu— Ꮍᴀᴇʟ (@elle91) December 12, 2018
39.
Let your date know you’re cultured by taking her to the symphony and saying “oh okay cool they’re doing it that way” when the oboes kick in
— andrew (@AndrewChamings) January 16, 2018
40.
Date: you know that was just a filter, right?
Me: *upset she’s not part puppy* it’s fine, I’m fine
— Boog (@bewgtweets) July 16, 2018
