Masha
41.
Him: Let's do it doggy-style
Me: I prefer catty-style
Him: oo what's tha-
Me: *already pushing him off the bed*— schmox (@IvoryGazelle) March 20, 2018
42.
[making out with date]
her: oooh someone's being naughty
me: [pulls away from kissing] shhh shut the fuck up, santa might hear you— Cat Damon (@CornOnTheGoblin) December 5, 2018
43.
https://twitter.com/jiovaughn/status/1066345514260606977
44.
https://twitter.com/mrjohndarby/status/1063415142728257536
45.
[first date]
her: yeah i'm gonna go
me: wait you only heard 12 out of my 37 reasons the emperor's new groove is the best disney movie
— rob from online 📱 (@robfromonline) December 12, 2018
46.
[Date]
Her: *flirting* I like someone who is good in bed.
Me: *trying to impress* I slept for 14 hours yesterday.
— ste(ph)en (@stephenjmolloy) April 19, 2018
47.
me: you're so beautiful
date: oh I bet you say that to all the girls
me: quiet, I'm on the phone
— marf (@MarfSalvador) January 9, 2018
48.
Me:
Date:
Me:
Date:
Me:
Date:
Me:
Date:
Me:
Date: when the waiter said enjoy your meal, did you say "you too"?
Me: ok you heard that— Jon (@ArfMeasures) August 2, 2018
49.
Why doesn’t anybody love me the way people on Catfish love strangers who won’t video chat
— michaela okland (@MichaelaOkla) July 11, 2018
50.
i don’t get how u cheat on a significant other. like how do you get 2 different ppl to like u. how
— touc (@aspiringtoucan) July 2, 2018
