Patricia Grisafi
Imagine that you are days away from giving birth when all of a sudden you go into labor. It happens! And everyone who wants to be present when that baby is born better have their phones ready for the call.
One Redditor, however, found that when she went into labor, she could not get her husband on the phone.
She called and called to no avail. Apparently, the OP’s husband is a very private person, so the OP didn’t even know if she should stop by his office to find him because she doesn’t know where his office is. But anyway, she’s in LABOR. There is no time to wander around an office building.
Her husband missed the birth, and now he’s blaming her for not trying hard enough to find him. No. No. No.
“My husband who I do love and does love me. Is a distant and private person. To everyone. His mom was having health problems, and I didn’t know until weeks later when I [speak] to her. I asked him how she was doing later and he said he didn’t know. That just how he deal with things. He doesn’t want to get to personal with anyone. We share hobbies and can have good conversations as long as they are not to personal. It can be off putting but I do genuinely enjoy his company,” the OP writes.
“Jump to this last week. I am pregnant and went into labor. It was only a few days before my due date so nothing concerning. I tried to call his work but his phone went right to voice mail because he was in a meeting. I text him. Still no answer. I waited a half hour the tried again and still couldn’t get through. My labor was getting further along. So I called a friend to get a ride to the hospital.”
“By the time my husband checked his phone at the end of the work day, I had already given birth to our daughter. Everything was very straight forward no complications we were ready to leave by the next morning. My husband is upset with me though. Saying I should have come by his work to tell him it was time. But he has alway’s been distant about work. I know what department he works in but not where his office is in the building. It would have been awkward.”
“My husband has told me what I did was unforgivable. He hasn’t called me an a**hole but has said I am horrible person for denying him the joy of seeing our daughter born.”
Redditors were incredibly sympathetic to the OP and not impressed with her husband.
“When your wife is getting within three fricken weeks of her due date – it is up to you to keep your phone on you at all times. THIS WASN’T A SURPRISE BABY – he knew it was coming – and once you are within a week of the due date it can really come at any time – the person carrying the baby already has enough to keep track of and do – the partner only really has to check their damn text messages. I can’t imagine what his coworkers would have thought if his wife showed up in labor and was all, ‘My husband won’t check his phone, I’m expected to go get him’ and then proceeded to have a baby in the front lobby because she didn’t take her ass to a hospital. I promise you people would tell that story for years and everyone at work would consider him an asshole of the highest order,” said Music_withRocks_In
“He expected you, a person in labor, to come to his work to find him, and he had his phone off (instead of silence or wtv) when he very much knew that you were days from your due date??? NTA, your husband is just clueless. He needs to have been better in general about paying attention,” said DenniPenni
“OP also just sounds like she’s always walking on eggshells around him, worrying about ‘invading his privacy,’ when in fact he’s keeping her at arm’s distance and withholding emotional intimacy. Sounds like OP’s husband wants to use this incident to further blame everything on OP and manipulate her. My god please rethink your relationship,” advised lilsunsunsun.
“NTA. Your husband let you down. He wasn’t there for you for the birth of your child and he’s making it about him. He has twisted this,” said angeliniana
“OMFG the very first thing I thought was ‘why wasn’t he checking his phone all day? Why didn’t he give her a direct number to call for an emergency?!’ When I was pregnant, my husband arranged with his boss to have his personal phone on, and also gave me the go-ahead to call him on the general work line and ask for him. This was all done weeks in advance, and I used it twice (two labor scares, turned out fine). He even took a few days before my due date off, just in case. OP better prepare herself to be a single parent, because he sounds like he’s really good at making things someone else’s problem. What’s going to happen in case of a real emergency? Kiddo fell down at school and needs stitches, baby has a weird rash and needs to see a doctor ASAP in case it’s an allergy, etc. He’ll be completely unreachable because hE kEePs ThInGs SePaRaTe. JFC, I can’t with this guy,” noted jhonotan1.
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