“What’s The Smallest Hill You’ll Die On?” – 25 Responses

There are some things in life that just aren’t worth putting up a fight for. However, we all have a small hill we’d be willing to die on. For some of us, that hill is more like a bump but nevertheless, the folks responding to this AskReddit thread are willing to die on it.

What’s the smallest hill you’ll die on?



double patty cheeseburger

Tall burgers completely nullify all the benefits of burgers and are an abomination unto cuisine.

A good burger is the perfect portable food. It should be edible using only your hands and mouth, without cutlery, and without making too much mess.

You should also be able to sample every layer of ingredient in one bite, without dislocating your jaw


Stainless Faucet
via, Photo by Steve Johnson on Pexels

It’s not a hot water heater. It’s a water heater.

3Me20 Added: I once went to Home Depot to buy a hot water heater. I talked to the dude in the plumbing section for quite a while. Really nice guy. He had his own plumbing business for 20 years until the ’08 crash. Had to sell the biz just to keep his house. He’s been working at HD ever since. Anyway, long story short: I decided to buy a cold water cooler instead.


The parents from Parent Trap are WAAAY worse than the parents from Home Alone.


Anonymous person pressing button of lift
via, Photo by Kelly on Pexels

Actual physical push buttons are way better than sensor buttons. (Like the Xbox 360 sensor buttons)


person holding credit card swipe machine
via, Photo by Blake Wisz on Unsplash

Tax should be included in the price with no exceptions.


tray of French macarons

Macaroons are not macarons. One has coconut, and one is a sandwich cookie.

wonderinglady20 Added:

I remember in high school my entire class argued with me about this. Macaroons are little coconut things, while macarons are pastry cookies. I argued with my entire social studies class about this including my teacher, before finally, he said LET’S LOOK IT UP. It’s not like I got anything out of being the only person right, but damn does it feel good to prove 30 other people wrong! At least they all know the difference now.


people playing soccer on green grass field during daytime

“Everyday” and “every day” are different. And not interchangeable.

“An everyday walk in the park” vs “I walk in the park every day.”


four markers on table
via, Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

Learn how to spell a name before you saddle a kid with it, for fuck’s sake.


JAWS must not EVER be re-made, or retconned, or re-imagined, or re-anything. Ever.


A Woman Opening a Refrigerator

Squeeze the air out of a Ziploc bag before you put the bag in the fridge or freezer. I don’t understand why my wife doesn’t and one of these days I’ll have a decision to make.


gray shopping cart

Returning a shopping cart is not that hard. It’s the least you can do when utilizing a service.


black car gps turned on in car

Touch screens in cars make them worse in many ways.


via, Photo by Jaye Haych on Unsplash

Mayonnaise and Miracle Whip are not interchangeable, they are drastically different.


white plastic bottle lot

Polycarbonate water bottles don’t contain any dangerous amount of BPA. It’s a marketing ploy by 3m Eastman to force people to use lower life cycle plastics. Tritan cracks at 2 years old, and polycarbonate lasts at least 20 years. They know polycarbonate is safe because we haven’t stopped using it in high-impact kitchen appliances like food processors and blenders. They created a shittier plastic that hurts the environment to make more money.

Cheap canned goods are literally lined with BPA. Polycarbonate bottles have fuck all to do with humans’ BPA exposure. If you own a polycarbonate water bottle keep using it, it has no BPA on it after the first time you wash it.

Source: MS mechanical engineering focused in polymers. One of my profs posted a few papers on this.

Edit: This (PDF LINK!!!!) is the paper if anyone is wondering. It found negligible amounts of BPA compared to canned goods after holding polycarbonate waterbottles full of water at 120C for 2 hours. Which would never happen in a real world situation.


black car on gray concrete road

Turn signals should NEVER be red.


via, Photo by Z Graphica on Unsplash

Frozen isn’t a Christmas or even a winter movie.

It is literally set in the summer, a big part of the plot is that everyone was unprepared for the summer freeze.

I will die on this hill.


white and black alarm clock on gray table

There is no need for people to say 7 am in the morning. The use of am lets us know its morning


Those new LED headlights should be banned. They might make the owner safer but not other drivers as they drive into fucking ditches because they were blinded by Klieg lights masquerading as car lights.


closed door
via, Photo by Noah Franz on Unsplash

If you (person A) pull open a door and someone (person B) is wanting to come through from the other side, HOLD THE DOOR AND LET THEM THROUGH. Similarly, if you are the other person, don’t dilly-dally, WALK THROUGH. Because the alternative is person A awkwardly trying to pass through whilst struggling to maintain holding the door open, leaving person B waiting awkwardly for them to finish.

Happens a lot at my office in the corridors and it does my head in.


photo of blackberry fruits
via, Photo by Nick Sarro on Unsplash

You can’t dethaw something. It’s thaw. That’s it.


You can’t just go around calling every bean paste hummus.

Hummus contains (among other things) significant amounts of tahini, chickpeas, and olive oil. If it doesn’t contain these things, it is not hummus. I repeat, not hummus.

No, Ashley and Brayden from the juice bar, you don’t get to tell me that the white-bean-and-kale mush on that $13 veggie wrap is goddamn hummus.


Woman in Blue Blazer Holding Smartphone

Speaker phone is not meant for use in public.


man in black suit jacket

If you don’t like being around others you’re not “anti-social”, you’re asocial. Anti-social is the Joker.

Incredibly petty and meaningless but this always bothers me for some reason


Mount Rushmore
via, Photo by Ronda Darby on Unsplash

There are zero reasons for two Dakotas. Just fucking merge into one big Dakota.


White Toilet Paper Roll on Toilet Paper Holder
via, Photo by Vie Studio on Pexels

The toilet paper flap falls to the front.