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Here’s A Live-Tweet Of That Jesus Time Travel Assassination Movie (26 Tweets)

Movies made for the evangelical community are always a confusing mix of sincerity, bonkers ideology, and modern references attempting to make the content relatable. The film Assassin 33 AD apparently has all that, plus time travel. Podcast host Laura Robinson watched the film so you don’t have to. Not that you planned to— but it’s still nice that she live-tweeted the experience.

And before you dive in, here’s the trailer to give you some visuals as she recounts the whole weird, racist mess:

Despite Robinson’s qualms, her husband managed to find it amusing, but getting through it gave her an injury:

She guessed that was because her husband didn’t grow up in deeply religious circles where this isn’t cringe entertainment—It’s gospel. The stuff she tweeted didn’t exactly paint a super clear picture of the film’s content aside from extreme violence:

And surprise surprise, it’s racist in multiple ways:

The movie was so bad it began to drive a wedge between the married couple watching it:

According to her, the filmmakers are so religious they’ve undermined their own religion:

I’m a little worried that these descriptions are so good that people will flock to ironically watch Assassin 33 AD, which will lead to a part two. God already seems pretty pissed with humanity, folks. Stop poking Him.

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