Bride-To-Be Gets Lit Up For Worrying Dad’s Wheelchair Will Ruin Her Wedding

Planning a wedding can be extremely stressful—especially trying to figure out which people will play a role in the ceremony.

One Reddit user dreamed of her dad walking her down the aisle—until her dad was paralyzed in a car accident. Now, the bride-t0-be doesn’t know if she can deal with her wheelchair-using father fulfilling that special role because it makes her “uncomfortable.” I know, just keep reading. It gets worse. 

“About three years ago my dad was injured in a really bad hit and run car accident. He broke just about every bone in his body, and left him paralysed from the waist down. Our relationship has always been really good, but I hate seeing him in pain and admittedly try to avoid seeing him because it just makes me uncomfortable,” the OP writes. 

“In November I’m getting married. I’ve been with my fiancé for 4 years and he and my dad get on really well. Naturally the discussion of who was going to give me away came up in the family group chat, and I kept silent after I realised my dad would be in a wheelchair. We always talked about him giving me away and having a dance at my wedding and I don’t want to be reminded of what could’ve been at my wedding.” 

While it’s definitely sad to deal with dreams of your wedding being different than reality, the great thing is the OP’s Dad is still alive and absolutely can take her down the aisle. So many people can’t have that opportunity. Can someone really be that selfish? 

“I messaged my mom privately and told her I want my uncle to walk me down the aisle as we’re incredibly close. She naturally asked why and I told her that my dad being in a wheelchair would add complications to the wedding. The walkway would have to be widened to accommodate his wheelchair and he wouldn’t be able to hold my arm or give me a proper hug,” the OP writes. “She was outraged, called me an ableist POS and removed me from the group chat. My aunt has since called me telling me my dad is absolutely devastated.”

It’s honestly a devastating situation, and Redditors were quick to advise the OP to take a look at her selfish behavior, saying that this was truly one of the most despicable posts they have ever read. 

“What an awful daughter. You avoid him because it is hard on you? What about him? Now you don’t want to accommodate him to walk you down the aisle? God you should be ashamed of yourself. Your fiancee should take a long look at who he is marrying,” said RoxyMcfly.

“It takes a really special kind of asshole to turn someone else’s paralysis into a ‘pity me’ situation,” explained NUTmeSHELL.

“My mother’s a quadriplegic who fully took part in my wedding. I can’t wrap my head around the amount of disgust and anger I feel reading that a grown woman wants to exclude her own father from her wedding, who she’s close with, because he’s in a wheelchair,” said monstera-lover. “He has probably thought about this day since she was born and I guarantee he never thought he would be attending his daughters wedding in a wheelchair, but I also guarantee he never thought he had the kind of daughter that would exclude him from her wedding because he is in a wheelchair.” 

“He can’t reach up and hold your arm? Well then reach down and hold his hand the way you probably did for YEARS as a child. Don’t wanna remember what ‘could have been’? Yeah well he’s gonna HAVE to think of the kind, grateful, considerate daughter he ‘could have’ had. Can’t hug him properly? What’s wrong with you that you can’t bend down and give him a hug??? Have you never seen a standing up person hug someone that’s sitting down? You don’t have to be a contortionist for that. Oh no the walkway would have to be WIDENED?!?! Omg devastating!!!/s. Just take one chair out of each row and add it to the outside of the row, or add another row in the back. I suspect your ableist, ungrateful, unkind behavior might add some complications to your marriage and to your relationship with your family,” said PsychologicalSwan1.

“I actually read your post about how you are avoiding your father because his disability makes you uncomfortable. And about how your concerns for your wedding are so fucking petty. And I’ve revised my previous position. YTA. But not just that – you’re one of the biggest fucking assholes I’ve seen in this sub. If I was related to you, I’d be so ashamed. And if I was your fiancee, I’d take this as a sign that our wedding vows would only be good until I had an accident and got disabled – then I could bet on you abandoning me because of your shallowness. You deserve all the shit you’re gonna get from this post,” JaneAustinAstronaut said. 

What do you think? Is there anything this bride can do to even come close to redeeming herself?

More wedding drama: 

Patricia Grisafi

Patricia Grisafi, PhD, is a freelance writer and educator. Her work has appeared in Salon, Vice, Bitch, Bustle, Broadly, The Establishment, and elsewhere. She is passionate about pit bull rescue, cursed objects, and designer sunglasses.