Reddit

Man Asks If He’s Wrong To Charge GF $24 Every Night She Sleeps Over

In most relationships that are moving forward, there’s usually a time when one partner will start spending more time at the other’s home. This could be sleepovers or a longer weekend stay. Maybe it’s always at one person’s place or maybe they split the time. But it’s a good sign that the relationship is ready to take on more intimate living issues, like housekeeping conflicts, personal habits, and communication styles.

It’s fun to move forward to this stage, but one Redditor recently asked if he was wrong for asking his girlfriend to start contributing to the bills—because she’s staying over three or four nights a week. 

“I (28M) have been with my girlfriend (22F) for about a year now and things have been going really well up until recently. We live in separate apartments and were spending about one night a week together at my place, but recently it has turned into three or four nights a week,” the OP writes. 

“Now, don’t get me wrong… I love having my girlfriend sleepover and I could even see us living together one day… However, when I asked her to start paying $24 each night she stays over, she got really upset. I explained that all of my utility bills have gone up significantly since she started staying over more and that $24 for one night in an $1800/mo apartment is a great deal. Heck, I wish I got to live in my apartment for that little.”

The OP says his girlfriend’s friends are telling her to get rid of him because that’s an absurd arrangement, and he’s confused.

“I’m afraid of ending up in a relationship where bills aren’t split equally and I don’t want to be with someone who just sees me as a meal ticket,” he writes. 

Redditors had a lot to say about the OP’s pay-to-stay plan—mostly that it’s messed up and that he needs to start thinking of his girlfriend as a guest in his home and not a tenant. 

“Just another shocking scenario where the person with the age gap is trying to take advantage of the younger partner,” observed one Redditor. 

“She’s a guest. If you feel it’s becoming a semi-permanent situation that you would like to become a permanent situation, then suggest THAT. I can’t even imagine how offended she was by her boyfriend asking her to pay a nightly fee to stay at his place,” wrote another. 

What do you think? Is it unreasonable to ask your partner to pay to stay the night?

More interesting AskReddit threads:

Patricia Grisafi

Patricia Grisafi, PhD, is a freelance writer and educator. Her work has appeared in Salon, Vice, Bitch, Bustle, Broadly, The Establishment, and elsewhere. She is passionate about pit bull rescue, cursed objects, and designer sunglasses.