The world is a bizarrely puritanical place when it comes to natural bodily functions, so I wasn’t sure what I was about to read in this r/AmItheA**hole post written by u/bloodyahole312 that he titled, “AITA for asking my wife not to check her period at the dinner table?”
It could have gone so many directions because there are definitely a lot of cis dudes who have weird opinions on menstruation, a very normal, messy, annoying part of life for most people with a uterus. It sucks, it’s monthly, and it has ruined many a pair of expensive underwear. I would personally like to see more patience and understanding extended to ME when I menstruate. Maybe paid vacation days? Free ice cream deliveries? Just spitballing here.
But when I read the actual story, the complaint seemed pretty legit:
Yesterday at dinner my wife stood up from the table, stuck her hand down her pants and checked for blood. Then loudly complained about her period. I asked her to please not do that at the table because I am eating.
We ended up getting in a big fight about it. She claims I am making her feel disgusting and having a period in a natural part of being a woman. I should not make her feel bad about it. My opinion is that is not what I was doing. I never censor her and I don’t think I have ever asked her not to talk about her period before. It’s just in that moment it felt inappropriate and over the top.
The OP says he and his wife have been together for a long time and have kids. He also said in some comments that she has done this before and it’s just the first time he has said anything about it. Yikes!
Commenters were pretty much across the board disgusted. Like I said, people have very different reactions to periods, so some of the comments drew some false equivalencies between poop and menstrual blood, IMHO. In general, though, the idea that one should go to the bathroom to deal with anything happening in your pants is a basic level of politeness that it’s reasonable to expect. Especially when you’re in company and there’s food around:
The OP edited to say that he was hoping to find support, but he’s a little worried he’s getting TOO MUCH support.
“This is almost going too well,” he wrote. “I was thinking I might use this post to win the argument but now I’m not sure how she would react to having 50 strangers on the internet unanimously decide that what she did was disgusting.”
Yeah. It might not win you any points for your wife to find out you exposed her to the Internet the way she exposed her underwear at the dinner table. Sometimes when you win you still lose.
More best and worst of Reddit AITA:
- “Seeing The Baby Come Out Was Overrated”—Man Bails On Wife In Labor With Twins To Go To Work
- Dad Bans Teen Daughter From Using Tampons Because He Fears They’re A “Gateway” To Sex
- Husband Asks If He Was Wrong To Call His Wife A “Karen” As An Insult In Front Of Other People
- Bride Wants To Know If She Can Ban Her Rude Sis From The Ceremony Over Her White Dress Stunt