“Don’t Get Married Before”—Woman’s Thread Of 20 Important Things To Know Goes Viral

Though more than half of marriages end in divorce, the ceremony is still considered a lifelong commitment. At the very least, you’re probably about to spend a bunch of money and a divorce won’t come cheap either. Why not make sure this is something you really are ready to do before burning all that dough? And despite what the movies have taught you, being “sure” does not mean feeling like you’re in love. Until death do us part is a really long time, so make sure you and your partner are compatible even on days when you’re not feeling as in love as you did during the first rosy month together.

Some people go to counseling before getting married, but here’s a DIY checklist offered by Twitter user @cxkenobxkerry, who doesn’t seem to have any official credentials. She does offer some compelling arguments for why she thinks these are the things you need to talk about before saying, “I do.”

She shared her list in late July, and it caused quite a bit of discussion. See what you think of her original points and then we’ll get to some of the counter-arguments:

1. Debt

2. Commitment

3. Kids

4. STDs

5. Timeline

6. Religion

7. Anger Management

8. ˜vibes˜

9. Clothes

10. Sex

11. Money

12. Personal Growth

13. Boundaries

14. Social Media

15. Savings

16. Cheating

17. Abuse

18. Death

19. Love

20. The Rest?

Reading all of these, I thought many seemed like things you would likely already know before anyone proposed. But there are a lot of difficult conversations that people don’t have about money that they really should. At the very least, having a list might make you think about stuff you’ve never talked about with your future spouse because it hasn’t come up—but it will. Why not address them before it’s too late to discover you’re on different pages?

Some people seem offended by the idea of trying to talk this stuff out at all, or they’re mad @cxkenobxkerry dared to offer her opinion on Twitter, a place notoriously free of opinions:

But she is unfazed by the criticism:


And a lot of people thanked her for bringing this stuff up:


What do you think? Anything you’d add to the list?

More marriage tweets: