For better or worse, in sickness or in health, for as long as we both shall keep stuffing full garbage cans further and further hoping the other person takes it out.
140 characters may not seem like a lot when it comes to describing a marriage, but these lawfully-wedded folks sure seem to have figured out how to air their marital dirty laundry on Twitter. Enjoy this selection of funny marriage tweets!
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I'm never more nervous than when I insist we're out of something and my wife goes to look for it herself.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 27, 2017
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Tell me how tired you are so I can upstage you and tell you how much more tired I am.
-marriage
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) September 2, 2017
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ME: I bought you some new undershirts.
HIM: [genuinely] That's exciting.
NARRATOR: Marriage.— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) February 4, 2016
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