Aimeé
21.
When a criminal steals a police car and gets pursued, it looks like a bunch of cops chasing nothing.—u/muff_marauder
22.
If Darth Vader walked just a little bit faster the Empire could have ended the Rebellion at least twice.—u/ArtificialLawyer
23.
They never tell you how much time you’ll waste as an adult trying to decide whether or not to keep a cardboard box —u/boilerup4444
24.
Your brain shows the most impressive example of machine learning when it generates fake conversations in your sleep for real people in your life —u/Ginger_Face
25.
Thanks to dating apps, a lot of flirting is now probably done while pooping.—u/wubberer
26.
If the telephone had been invented after email, we would have thought it was a vast improvement in communication.—u/mfairplay
27.
If we would fart from the penis instead of the anus, the sound would probably be like whistle. —u/crazepok
28.
In almost all sports, gravity is the main opponent.—u/french_st
29.
The nicest and the meanest things ever said about you were probably said by family members—u/LightLatias
30.
No one goes to McDonald’s because they want a burger, they go to McDonald’s because they want McDonald’s. —u/jaruz01
31.
People came up with more showerthoughts posts while being high than in the shower. —u/tahtpotsGMO
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