secretly rich
Relationships

Woman Supporting “Aspiring Writer” Fiancé Discovers He’s “Ridiculously Rich,” And People Are Dragging Him

Usually, when people get engaged they have some kind of an idea about how the other person’s finances are. After all, you’re presumably planning for a future in which money will be necessary. How will you budget things? Pay for a home? Plan for future needs? Talking about financial issues can be difficult, but it’s a part of life in a relationship.

But what happens if your partner hasn’t been upfront about money? What if you’ve been the one working to support both yourself and your partner—and then you find out your partner is secretly rich? That’s the problem one Reddit user is dealing with, sparking a conversation about honesty as well as financial abuse. 

“I just found out that my fiancé is wealthy and I mean ridiculously so,” the OP writes. “He proposed to me and then a few days ago he started talking about prenups and I laughed at that, saying, ‘broke people don’t have prenups”‘ and he was like, ‘who said I was broke?'” 

“The problem isn’t that he comes from money, has money, it’s that I am angry that I never knew that that he could’ve helped us pay for our dog’s surgery by paying for it, but no, I had to sell the only thing of worth I had in my life in order to finance our dog’s medical bills,” the OP says. “I have literally been providing for us because he’s an aspiring writer and I wanted to help him in his dreams. I pay the bills and provide for us both.” 

She later says that the thing she had to sell was her dead mother’s violin. Cue tears of outrage—for the dog and the OP because who lets someone do that?   

The OP says she is confused as to why her fiancé hid the truth about his financial status—especially since they have been together for four years. She says that she wants to make sure her anger is well-placed, since she grew up poor and her view “on money and wealth might be skewed.”

She explains that she feels her fiancé used her and that she feels resentful for having to work “crazy hours” and a second job to support the two of them. She adds that her fiancé has always had full access to his inheritance. Later, she also added that they did discuss finances and he led her to believe he didn’t have any. 

The post has since been deleted on Reddit, but on Twitter it’s causing a storm of responses, with lots of people siding with the OP and expressing incredulity over the entire situation. 

https://twitter.com/blackmediocrity/status/1297017928513212416

What do you think the OP should do in this situation?

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Patricia Grisafi

Patricia Grisafi, PhD, is a freelance writer and educator. Her work has appeared in Salon, Vice, Bitch, Bustle, Broadly, The Establishment, and elsewhere. She is passionate about pit bull rescue, cursed objects, and designer sunglasses.