Ruin My Week
Becoming a mom shouldn’t take over your entire identity, but it definitely seems to take over your wardrobe. And hair care routine. And whether or not you think it’s worth applying mascara. There’s a learning curve, at least, and some days have space for mom to dress up, some do not. This transformation isn’t a big deal, but if you think other people aren’t noticing, bad news: they are. Especially the kids.
Writer Aubrey Hirsch shared a story with her followers about how a child ended up dragging her different morning looks, the “pretty” one and the “other” one. She says the kid in her son’s class was convinced her son had two moms, because two clearly two different women were showing up at school. But when the kid described these moms, Hirsch recognized both as herself.
Kid in my son’s class explained to me that she was sure he has two moms because he has “the pretty mom and the other mom.” She described each to me in some detail.
Reader, both are me.
— Aubrey Hirsch (@aubreyhirsch) February 9, 2020
It’s a cute story about what children notice (how bad or good you look) and what they don’t notice (that you are one person). It went viral, however, because it’s apparently one of the most relatable things in the world to other moms.
Some days they can be pretty mom and some days they just can’t. That’s when the Other Mom arrives, with her hair in a bun and mismatching shoes.
One year at Passover my (now) husband’s aunt told me I was prettier than the girl he brought “last year.” Yup, I was the girl he brought “last year.” 🤦🏻♀️
— Jamie Beth Cohen wrote WASTED PRETTY! (@Jamie_Beth_S) February 9, 2020
I was watching a late night tv with my then 3 yr old son who wouldn’t sleep.
He pointed at the first guest, Kim Kardashian, and said: “That’s Mommy!”
I was flattered until he pointed and said the same thing about the 2nd guest: a fully- bearded Joaquin Phoenix.
— Michelle (@blue_chelley) February 10, 2020
I will never forget the day my young son asked, while looking at our wedding photo “Mom, who is that pretty lady next to Dad?”
— Ulla Meredith (@UllaMeredith) February 10, 2020
HAH. My daughter has two mums (Mummy and Mama), and sometimes talks about her “old mummy”.
We eventually discovered that she meant me, before I shaved my head…
She still firmly believes she has 3 mothers; Mama, Mummy (current, shaved head) and ‘old’ Mummy (with long hair).
— BitterSappho (@BitterSappho) February 10, 2020
My son once looked at a picture of me with makeup and said ” who’s that?”
— Carol Lopez (@_CFierroLopez_) February 9, 2020
And the always popular and completely bush league “don’t have to leave the house at all” version. Thats my favorite!
— Kristen G. (@kristenglcsw) February 10, 2020
The day after my wedding, my niece (4) refused to believe I was the same person who married her uncle the night before. “MY aunt Betsy is beautiful!”
— Betsy Berman (@Betsyberman) February 10, 2020
Honestly, the burns these kids are unintentionally laying on their friends and relatives are about to send someone to the hospital:
My friend’s 5-year-old told me this week that she “loved” my voice and then did an impression of me saying “cooool” in a monotone. It was scathing.
— Beth Newell (@bethnew) February 9, 2020
Lmao I dropped my son off the other day and was walking back through the school and a 5th grader looked at me and asked “is today pajama day?” And I was like uhh no I’m just tired
— Kaitlin McGlone Vonderschmitt (@kaitlinmcglone) February 10, 2020
My daughters friend once asked why I put basketballs in my bra, and when I told her those things are called breasts, she said, “huh-uh, there is no way those are real breasts, they don’t look anything like my moms.”
— marla hanson (@starsih) February 9, 2020
My son put a picture of my husband and me on date night on his “Star Student” poster. In his practice introduction, he said, “This is my dad. This is my mom with makeup on.” Thanks kid. Way to set them straight.
— SAWoodard (@Sawoodard22) February 10, 2020
When my kid sees that I’ve had a shower: “Where you going?” Um, just showering.
— feminist.mama (@ValerieQ) February 10, 2020
This is definitely better than when a kid in my kid’s Tae kwon do class asked me if I was his mom or his grandma. TWICE. I am 41 and have exactly ONE gray hair
— Erin Human (@theeisforerin) February 10, 2020
One night on call I was showing my senior resident my then 3 yr old wedding picture.
she asked – oh, which one are you?
🤔“The one in the middle with the fancy indian clothes”
“Oh, makeup does a lot for you” 😂😂😂
— Subha Airan-Javia, MD FAMIA (@subhaairan) February 10, 2020
I left early one morning, before my 4yo woke, to go on a job interview. On my way home I stopped to pick up groceries. Door was locked, my hands were full so I rang the doorbell. My 4yo peeks out the window and yells “Dad there’s some lady at the door and she has lipstick on.” 😄
— 💎Julianna💎 (@elphaba_wins) February 10, 2020
I tell my daughter, “See that skinny girl in the photo? Yeah. I ate her.”
— Doritos for Dinner (@doritos4dinner) February 10, 2020
My grandmother, 90 years old, had a beautiful photo of herself taken in 1940s when was 45 on her wall. Little Rosemary, 5 years old, asked her who it was. Grandmother said, “That’s me!” Rosemary studied it for a while then said, “Oh, I understand! You got a new head.”
— Desha (@Desha7) February 10, 2020
My sister got a full face of makeup done for an event and my nephew said she looked beautiful like a clown
— Rhetorical Geisterfahrer (@solaana) February 10, 2020
My niece used to hold my face in her little 3 year old hands and tell me I was pretty.
Then we watched Wizard Of Oz and the green witch came on and she jumped up in delight yelling PRETTY PRETTY
I never believed another word she’s said since
— Princess Damnit 🌊❄ (@Fes_Toy) February 10, 2020
Kids can be so cruel. And accurate.
